Yotsumoto Yasuhiro / 四元康祐 – Ⅰ

Reading a Wife  

 

 

 

A wife is not composed of words, so

Unlike a novel that takes till dawn

To devour she cannot be read

through in a night

 

Repeating the uneasy lines of a poem

Over and over, rereading again and again

would be different, too (though it probably looks the same)

 

Yesterday, while driving the car

In a break in the din

I heard for a moment the beat of a bird’s wings

Ah, I thought

 

That ‘Ah’ was just for one moment, but

It would need an eternity to comprehend, never mind

My wife, who is before me sleeping or awake

 

Is it arrogant to even want to read a person?

Not her expressions or gestures

But to want to read that person, my wife

Unable to be satisfied with just living together?

 

My wife speaking to me from across the table

My wife wordlessly tossing and turning in bed

The one there that seems like

Loyal ladies-in-waiting serving a wife I can’t see

 

In the breath inscribed in each sentence

Punctuated by daily reality

Its draft turns the pages of my wife

 

I wish to grasp not the look but the way of the words

In a quiet place far from both my wife and myself

And like a twig that smells the approach of snow in the air

I want to read my wife

 

 

 

 

 

 

妻を読む

 

 

 

 

妻は言葉では書かれていないので

長編小説を朝までかかって

読みあげるようには

ゆかない

 

気になる詩の数行を

繰り返しなんども読み返すのとも

（似ているかもしれないが）違うだろう

 

昨日車を運転していたら

騒音の隙間から

一瞬鳥の羽ばたく音が聴こえて

あ、とぼくは思った

 

その<あ>も一瞬だが

読み解こうとすれば永遠がいる

まして妻は寝ても覚めてもぼくの目の前

 

ひとを読もうだなんて不遜だろうか

表情でも仕草でもなく

妻そのひとを

一生一緒に生きてゆくだけでは満足できずに

 

食卓越しに話しかけてくる妻

無言で寝返りをうつ妻

そこにいるのは

見えない妻に仕える忠実な侍女たちのよう

 

一息ごとに綴られる文章に

現実が句読点を打つ

吹き込んできた風に妻が捲られている

 

字面ではなく文体を捉えたい

妻からも自分からも遠く離れた静かな場所で

大気に雪の気配を嗅ぐ小枝のように

妻を読みたい